Posted on: August 20, 2009 1:00 am
Edited on: August 20, 2009 1:53 am

Dear Memphis: time to pay the piper

Not sure what's less surprising: that Gary Parrish again beat the world on a huge college basketball story or that, once more, it's proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that John Calipari is a despicable, shameless used car salesman.

Wait. I'm sorry. I just offended all used car salesmen. I apologize. Not even a used car salesman would have two of his Final Fours vacated.


Calipari is the Michael Jordan of malfeasance.

And now he's all yours, Kentucky.


I can't believe I once tried to -- somewhat -- defend Calipari. I went against my better instincts and thought at the time: no one can be as dirty as his rivals claim.

Boy was I wrong. His critics underplayed his scumminess.

There's a lesson here. When anyone ever dared criticize Calipari's methodology a legion of Memphis fans would respond with mountains of personal vitriol. You'll see some of that in the comments section below.

They'd defend Calipari at any cost. So would school officials. All along they had to know that something wicked was on the horizon because when it comes to Calipari something wicked is always on the horizon.

Now that Calipari has raised his hind leg and defacated all over the basketball program by causing Memphis to now have the unique distinction of having its Final Four appearance tossed in the trash -- all before scampering off to Kentucky -- what do Memphis fans and university backers think of him now?

The university and its fans fully embraced Calipari and now both entities are reaping what they sowed.

And you're next Kentucky.

Calipari will win at Kentucky. He might even capture a national championship. But eventually everything will crumble to dust because with Calipari that's what happens.

Hopefully Kentucky has all of its lawyers on hot standby.

You're going to need them.

Category: NCAAB
Tags: Memphis
Posted on: May 28, 2009 10:52 am

Calipari knows when to exit

Well, well Memphis fans. Wonder what you think of your guy John Calipari now?

Now that your program is about to -- as Emmitt Smith might say -- get blowed up do you still think Calipari is so great?

Whenever I've criticized Calipari as the greasy car salesman that he is Memphis fans flooded with me with obnoxious and angry e-mails decrying Calipari as a good man.

Is he still a good man, Memphis fans, now that he might have -- allegedly -- overseen a program that faces major sanctions?

Memphis fans were always blind suckers, falling for Calipari's charms.

And don't laugh, Kentucky fans, because you're next.

If there's one thing predictable about Calipari it is this. When he leaves somewhere a mushroom cloud remains in his wake.

He's coached two college programs. At UMass, that program was left in a pile of smoldering ruins, it's Final Four appearance vacated.

Now, the same thing could happen at Memphis.

And Kentucky is next.

Category: NCAAB
Tags: Memphis
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